Immitation ala Dear John
07.02.2010 19 °C
February 7, 2010
8:00 pm, Dubai Time
It’s 3 hours before my arrival in dubai, i endured 6 hours of sitting and doing nothing. We’re only few on this flight, My row allows 10 people to seat but 6 seats were just taken. I did watch a couple of movies and listen on Taylor Swiift’s and Lady Gaga’s music.
Compared to last time, it’s harder this time around, i cried on the entrance of the airport, i cried when i hug Mamita, i cried when i hug my father, i cried whenever a sad song plays on our way to the airport, i cried whenever im talking with you, I cried when Lalaine told me to take care of my self, i cried even just by posting my goodbyes on facebook.
As i’ve said earlier i wish there’s a repeat button where i can play it over and over again, i wish it wouldn’t stop, i wish i could do things that i forgot to do, i wish i could show even more how i love the people that’s been left in the Philippines, i wish someday i don’t need to leave. I wish to just be with the people that i really love, i wish to be with you always.
Ill be working again in Dubai not knowing what lies ahead, but it’s different this time around. I have something that i don’t have the first time, its the realization that life’s unfair that’s a fact but it’s still worth living because i know i have you, i have the person that i love the most. I have you that’s been the best thing that happens in my life.
I’m scared ofcourse but im hopeful that ours will last till lifetime, yes you’re right that life will go on with us not being around together physically, but im holding on to the memories of the things that we shared. I believe that if we really are right for each other, even if this time’s not the right time, there’s a place and time that’s right for us.
I love you, i do. Though for you it’s been used a lot of times already i will still and continue to say it because i don’t want you to wake up one day and forget that i love you, so i will say it every single day para hindi mo makalimutan kung gaano kita kamahal. I want you to be happy with the people you’re with, masakit kasi kung sumasaya ka na sa ibang tao, nakakaliimot tayo. Ayokong kalimutan mo ko dahil Masaya ka na sa piling ng ibang tao. Alam ko na sobrang nagkulang ako sa kung anu dapat yung ginawa ko, kahit ilang beses man ako mag apologize hindi na maibabalik yung panahon na dapat na ginawa ko yung responsibilidad ko bilang nagmamahal sayo. Salamat sa lahat, if it’s someone else, they wouldn’t accept me anymore. Kaya salamat sa lahat ng ginawa mong sakripisyo saken.
I love you and everyday will be days that i will continue to love you. Laptop’s getting drained, i don’t have an outlet to plug and charge it. It will just be an hour before the plane will land in Dubai. So for now i will just hold on to our promises of loving each other even when we hate each other, i will hold on to you. I promise to love you the way you deserve to be love.
Mahal kita.Mahal na mahal.
I know you love me,